Today is 9/11.For the first time in the 7 yrs I woke up without a pang in my heart on this date. I was actually annoyed that every tv channel this morning it seems was carrying a live broadcast of the memorial service. And I was annoyed when a slim crowd of demonstrators was blocking my way as I was rushing to a business meeting on the narrow streets of downtown Manhattan.
It was the evening news actually that brought the pain of that horrible day 8 yrs ago right back.
They were talking about the war in Afghnistan on the evening news, and that it is a lost cause we should forget about.
We’ve been there for 8 yrs now and are losing ground. “Why would we send more troops there” they questioned.
Well, 8 yrs of peace and general fatigue of endless wars abroad can make us forget, that it was Afghanistan where the tragedy of 9/11 originated. The Taliban that has gained back 80% of the territory was the breeding ground from where the enemy struck.
I have not lost anyone to the 9/11. But like everyone else, I’ve lost the carefree ease of life, maybe, forever. I am not even talking about having to show my ID and open my bags every time I step into a building in my city, or about endless security checks at the airports.
I am talking about the loss of innocence, high expectations, etc.
The lives of every American have not been the same, this recession including.
But by quitting all wars we are not going to get back the innocence of life in peace and prosperity. We have not won it.
No doubt that by starting the unnecessary war in Iraq, we forgot about the necessary war in Afghanistan, and all our gains there were eroded.
But if we quit now, Taliban and Al Queda will win and we can expect many more 9/11s.
In fact, we are likely to lose 3 countries to Taliban and Al Queda at once, as Pakistan is struggling to hold them off and is likely to lose without our presence there.
With Pakistan going unstable, India will tremble.
Who cares, you may ask. These countries are so far away.
Well, they still have airplanes that fly great distances, and very determined killers who hate us.
Whatever is left of our way of life, I would rather defend it.
Whatever it takes, even an endless war. That war is the only right war, because it keeps the enemies at bay.
THE ONLY RIGHT WAR
Posted by Ella Moss on September 11, 2009
Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: 9/11, afghanistan, Afgunistan, Al Queda, India, news, Packistan, Pakistan, Taliban, troops, war | 2 Comments »
MY OMNIPRESENT GURU
Posted by Ella Moss on August 26, 2009
In 2004, I had a gum infection that cost me $7000 to take care of and sent me over the edge into bankruptcy (so what’s the deal with the Universal health care idea? How many people should choose between financial and physical hardships before it becomes reality?…)
Anyhow, this spring an oral surgeon pointed to my x-ray and told me, “it’s baaack. Pony up another $6000 as an implant is now needed” (well, maybe, the words were different, but the meaning was the same) – where’s that universal health care again… Needless to say, I don’t have this money, so I left for my summer vacation with an uncertain future.
As time went on, I began feeling pain and sensitivity to cold. Dismayed, I made an appointment with another dentist. Terrible foreboding of the utter financial ruin killed many of my plans.
But before I went to see a doctor, I prayed to my guru, Sai Baba, and put a bit of vibuhti (a sacred ash He creates) in my mouth.
As I was doing it, I felt as if He looked down on me from His portrait up on the altar. At that moment I knew my prayer was answered.
I still went to my appointment. More x-rays were taken. I was cleared. No infections. Not even a cavity.
ANOTHER MIRACLE FROM SATHYA SAI BABA!
As my way of thanking Him, I’ve decided to dedicate this post to my experiences with Him, as I am so blessed to have Him in my life!
I first heard of Sai Baba either in late 1996 or early 1997 from my astrology student. She was his devotee and she gave me a few books to read about Sai Baba.
Although I found some of the books interesting, I could not believe their main assertion that Sai Baba is the Avatar of our age. Moreover, I regarded the whole idea of a guru as a dangerous fallacy. I thought that when people put gurus / priests and the like between themselves and God, they separate themselves from God, giving up on having direct connection with the Creator and relieving themselves of responsibility for their own spiritual growth.
Personally, I have enjoyed and cherished such direct connection with God since childhood. God has always been my Guru, and I did not see the need for another.
In December of 1997, everything has changed.
I was stuck in Katmandu, Nepal with my youngest sister and her 3-year-old boy, my nephew. Due to unforeseen circumstance, we had very little money. On top of it, my relationship with my sister was deteriorating.
In the beginning of our trip, we were planning to travel through India, and I still had Indian airline tickets, which I bought in advance.
My sister’s Nepalese husband has not arrived from Russia, as planned, and her Nepalese relatives were advising us against the trip to India. I did not want to go there by myself, all alone during the Holidays. I was afraid to travel with my sister and nephew, as money was unexpectedly tight, and the boy was so young. Spending another month in Nepal did not inspire me either. I felt like I was there already 1 month too long. But my ticket back to the U.S. was on 1/15, more than a month away.
As I was considering all these options in my mind, I was passing by merchants’ stalls, and I’ve noticed little medallions of Sai Baba on sale. Spontaneously, I bought one. I looked at it and thought: “If you are an Avatar, like they say, what should I do?”
Immediately, a thought came into my mind: “Go home for the Holidays”.
The thought felt foreign to me, there was unmistakable Indian accent there, not to mention, that I did not even consider such a possibility before. “How am I going to do that?”, I asked, “How can I change my ticket less than 2 weeks before Christmas?”
“Don’t worry”, I heard a thought with an Indian accent in my head.
That very day, I went to a travel agent, and asked him to change my ticket to December 20th or so. He was skeptical. “You are asking for a miracle,” he said.
Ten days later, he called me and announced, “The miracle has occurred. You are going to get home in time for Christmas!”
And I went home for Christmas, and it felt so good to be home!…
Since then, I started taking Sai Baba seriously.
Some time later, he came to me in my dream. In that dream, I was standing in front of a mirror, practicing a lecture on astrology. Suddenly, Sai Baba appeared, saying, “So, you like to teach?”. I was so startled, I woke up. That week, I related that dream to my student, Sai Baba’s devotee. “Yes”, she said, “he does scare people sometimes. But if he comes into someone’s dream, it is for real. They say, one cannot dream about Sai Baba without him actually coming into the dream”.
But that still was not enough for me to become a full-blown Sai Baba’s devotee. I was apprehensive, and I did not want anyone to bud into my direct relationship with God.
In the early September of 1998, I got very sick. My period has presumably ended, but I continued to bleed, and I was bleeding with such force – as if someone turned on a faucet. I was afraid to go to a doctor, and for a few days, I simply prayed for healing.
I continued to bleed, however, getting weaker and weaker. Soon, it was hard to get off the couch, but I continued to work and pray for healing. By the fourth day, I could hardly feel my body, and a few steps would make my heart beat, as if I ran a marathon.
That night, Sai Baba came into my dream. “What kind of healing do you want?”, he asked. Again, I was startled, and said the first thing that came into my mind: “A classical one”. Suddenly, pipes were playing, and I saw a huge stage curtain made of red velvet.
Sai Baba waved his hand, the curtain opened, and Jesus Christ came into the opening.
All I can say, that it was more real, then our everyday reality, and I was so overcome with joy, seeing Jesus Christ walking towards me, that I lost my mind. Like a little child, I was overcome with excitement. “Jesus Christ! Jesus Christ! Jesus Christ!..”, I kept screaming his name over and over again. He smiled, and as I realized that I was behaving like a child, I saw myself being a child in my dream. I felt embarrassed, but I could not help myself. I was besides myself with joy and excitement. Jesus Christ came over to me and picked me up. “So, what do you want?”, he asked me.
At that moment, my strange bleeding and the urgent need for healing have totally left my mind. I was so happy to see him, that I totally forgot I needed healing! All I could remember was one thing I have always wanted: “Faith”, I said.
For the longest time, I have wanted to have faith as strong as the faith of Jesus Christ. Even though God has created numerous miracles for me almost on everyday basis (from mundane (making onto a leaving bus, healing my puppy when all vets gave up on it, etc., to breathtaking (taking me back in time)), I knew my faith was rather feeble.
Jesus Christ smiled, put me down, and placed the palm of his hand on mine. I knew, that he was transmitting faith to me symbolically.
Then I woke up. Because the dream was so real and more vivid than my reality, I felt like I grew wings.
However, I continued to bleed. But that morning I was able to summon up the courage to go to the doctor.
At first, the doctor could not believe my claim. Then he checked my blood pressure, fixed the bleeding problem (at that point, I hardly bled, because, according to him, I hardly had any blood left) and sent me to the hospital for emergency blood transfusion. At the hospital I was told that I should have gone into shock or be dead already, because I lost some incredible percentage of blood. I do remember that, after the transfusion, the higher number of my blood pressure was 37.
In other words, I should have been dead, but I was not. Another miracle?
I also must say that my faith has grown slowly but steadily since then.
After Sai Baba brought Jesus Christ to me, any doubt that I had about him, has disappeared from my mind, and I became his ardent devotee.
Meanwhile, one day, as my boyfriend was fixing something in my apartment, some acid got into his eye, and he collapsed onto my rug in pain. That second I felt so helpless, I picked up the phone to dial 911. But suddenly I remembered: Sai Baba’s vibuhti!
My student, who told me about Sai Baba, gave me a tiny paper pouch with his vibuhti before I left for India. I totally forgot about it, and never took it with me. Now, almost a year later, I remembered it and found it immediately. I poured a bit of the grey powder onto my boyfriend’s eye, and immediately he stopped crying. “What did you do?”, he asked in surprise, “My pain is gone!”. I was just as amazed at the power of vibuhti as he was.
Soon afterwards, my boyfriend complained of the terrible pain in his liver area. As he took off his shirt, I saw his liver being so enlarged that it raised the ribs above it.
Without saying anything, I poured water in a glass, squeezed there a few drops of lemon, and mixed it with the rest of the vibuhti I had left. My boyfriend drank the mixture, and soon, within that day (!) he was fine.
I began to feel the need to visit Sai Baba’s center, and so I ventured there one Thursday.
I was unimpressed with the gathering. It did not have the charged meditative atmosphere I was used to, when I would come to meditate at the SRF center.
Afterwards I went for coffee with one of the ladies, and she said that next week they are going to celebrate Sai Baba’s birthday.
I remember that the day of celebration we were supposed to go skiing, and I begged my friends to postpone the departure, so I could be at the celebration. We agreed to leave early next morning, but I was to spend the night at my friends’ house, so we don’t lose any more time.
So I went to celebrate Sai Baba’s birthday dressed in skiing jacket and pants.
Actually, I ran, because I was certain that I was an hour late.
I was shocked to find out that I have arrived an hour early! There was no one there except for people in charge of arrangements.
In front of the stage, in the midst of the seats for the audience, there was a chair prepared for Sai Baba. It had flower garlands and his orange robe on it. There were also flowers spread all around it.
I was told that no one expects Sai Baba to appear in person. “He is here in spirit”, a lady said to my questions.
Boldly, I sat down to the left of Sai Baba’s chair and began to meditate. I felt his presence strongly, and my meditation was deep and satisfying.
But I had to leave before the festivities were over.
Before I left, I picked up an orange flower from the floor, where Sai Baba’s feet would have rested. I put it in my sack, that was already filled to the rim.
As I was going to the exit door, I’ve decided to take the flower out of my sack and put it in the pocket of my skiing jacket, so the flower would not get crushed.
As I left the building, I went to have a cigarette before heading for the subway. I sat down in the tiny square right across the street. My cigarettes were in the same pocket where I have placed the flower. Carefully, I moved the flower to another pocket, and light up my cigarette.
I could not truly enjoy that cigarette though, because, in about 10 feet away from me, there was a young man, who was obviously mentally disturbed. He was talking to himself, gesticulating widely (it was the time before cell phones).
“He is the one who needs a blessing”, I thought, and decided to give him Sai Baba’s flower. I finished my cigarette and unzipped the pocket where I have placed the flower. To my total awe, I found 2 flowers that were completely identical!
So I gave one flower to the young man, and went to my friend’s house.
While on my way there, I contemplated the miracle and realized what Sai Baba was saying to me with this gesture: God has enough blessings for everyone, so when blessing is shared, it does not lessen, it only grows!
A month later I had a dream I could not remember, but, because of it, I found myself in the morning talking outloud to my higher-self. I was given a choice: I may continue my life as it was then (happy, professionally and emotionally fulfilled, independent, but with romantic attachments), or I may choose to have a family (husband, children) and be able to express love and care. I was told / shown that the second choice is going to be painful.
To me, it was not even a choice. Of course, I want to be able to live and express love and care! After all, I know God as Supreme Love and Care, and I want to be just like Him!
So that morning I made a commitment to God to start a family.
My boyfriend was an obvious choice. We loved each other, and for the past 3 years he begged me to marry him and start a family.
But wait, just last night I threw him out, being totally mad at him for a good reason, and thinking that our relationship should be finally over!
I immediately called him, and told him that I am ready to take him back. He said something like: “Great! I am going to step by to see you as soon as I can, but I just got a lucrative contract and I am extremely busy.”
A month later, I found out that he got a new girlfriend, not a contract, and all this time he was extremely busy with her.
To be sure, I was pulling away from him for a good year, thinking that we should break up. But now, instead of feeling relief, I felt the most intense emotional pain. My self-importance was slighted as never before (he chose another woman over me!), but also my most important commitment to God was in obvious jeopardy.
For the next 18 days I could not either eat nor sleep. None of the sleeping pills were helpful, and I was afraid of losing my mind.
Since I could not sleep, I meditated. But, even as I would banish every thought out of my mind, I would still feel the most intense emotional pain.
And then I had two the most important meditations in one day:
In the morning, as I was meditating, I caught the presence of my higher-self. It felt as if It was staring at me with utmost interest, thinking “How dramatic!..”, while I was being pierced by intense emotional pain in the absolute stillness of my mind, voided of all thoughts. This allowed me to shift my perspective, and I got out of that meditation, laughing. The pain was gone.
In the afternoon, I meditated again, as it was my usual practice before starting teaching my regular astrology class.
Nothing unusual seemed to have transpired during the meditation itself. But I must have been in the state of “second attention”, as Carlos Castaneda would have called it. Because I got out of it truly feeling / realizing my Divinity.
Yes, intellectually, I knew for the longest time that I am part of the Divine, and Divinity is my true nature, which is true for every human being. But I never felt it before, therefore I could never own it.
This was the most significant realization in my entire life: finally, even if for a fleeting moment, there were no spiritual distance between me and God, finally I was able to “touch” God!
I have also felt the imprint of Sai Baba’s presence at that moment, and I knew he made this realization possible. He was not just an omniconscious miracle-maker, he was a true guru.
In less than a year, I’ve met a man, who became my husband and the father of my child.
In the fifth month of my pregnancy, I was stricken with lime disease. My husband went to Sai Baba’s meeting, asking for vibuhti. Incredulously, there was a man, who had a packet of vibuhti, given to him by Sai Baba himself.
It relieved my fever, and there were no bad consequences to this dangerous illness.
In the seventh month of my pregnancy, I performed a Hindi ritual, dedicating my child to Sai Baba.
Although I felt like my pregnancy was ordained by God, and I felt constant loving presence of the Divine, I was still worried about karmic intent of the soul that was about to become my son.
So Sai Baba came to me in the dream, saying that this soul is my friend, and how to name the child.
My son was born on Thursday (Sai Baba’s day), on the 9th day of a month, at 9 PM.
Giving him birth was surprisingly easy, and I had none of the usual complications and problems, except for occasional backache.
Sai Baba’s birthday was coming, and I was intent on coming to the celebration. I was thinking of it, while sitting in a rocking chair and nursing my son. My back was bothering me, and I thought to myself, that I should not forget to ask Sai Baba at his birthday celebration to cure my backache. Immediately, pain stopped never to return!
There were many big and little miracles of that nature since then. Although I stopped doing spiritual healings myself, because I was overly tired and overly stressed most of the time, occasionally I had either a request or an urge to do so. During those few times, I felt Sai Baba’s presence, and I knew it was his energy that facilitated healing.
In 2003, He summoned me to India, as I had hard time with my marriage and the terrible turn the world took in 2001. I did not know I needed help, but He did!
While I did not get the interview, He took my letter, and, on my last day at the ashram, despite the exceptionally huge crowd (there was some kind of celebration that day), He came out to the outskirts where I was and LOOKED AT ME. Our eyes met, and I felt my soul being scanned and cleaned.
Oh, there were many miracles, coincidences and teachings. Too many to put all in one post. But that moment of Him looking at me was a more defining spiritual experience than when another Indian guru raised my kundalini.
As I am about to end this story, I want to mention a few other interesting miracles I have received from Sai Baba in the past few years.
In 2004, my husband and I needed to move. A month later, after seeing lots of apartments, I have found the one we are living in now. It is a spacious 2 bedrooms, 2 baths apartment with incredible view of the park, in the building that is well kept, and it is cheaper then other apartments I’ve seen.
A few months after the move I found a letter to Sai Baba that I wrote in my PDA in February of 2004, asking him for a precisely such apartment! I wrote it obviously on my way to work, without much hope, and totally forgot about it!
Moreover, my neighbor next door just happened to be a Sai Baba’s devotee! He came to her in a dream and told her to to talk to me, so she went over and introduced herself to me. Even better, we have discovered that we both have memories of the same past live where we were sisters! (How’s that for a coincedence?)
Yes, there have been plenty of other miracles too, but I am not writing a book, just a “Thank You” note to Sai Baba. He has always been there for me, since He came into my life in 1997.
It’s been enormous privilege to have a true Avatar as a guru. With Sai Baba at the helm, my life is the greatest ride ever:-)!
Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: avatar, blessings, Faith, guru, healing, Jesus Christ, kundalini, miracles, Sai Baba, Sathya Sai Baba, universal health care, vibuhti | Leave a Comment »
MY KINDER UNIVERSE
Posted by Ella Moss on July 21, 2009
When my son was 1.5 y.o., I joined the majority of Russian community in NYC and rented a “dacha” in Catskills for a summer.
“Dachas” are cottages in a small community of summer residents, located in rural areas, often by a lake.
The cottages offer minimal amenities. “Dachniki” must bring with them bedding, pans and pens, and everything else that would sustain them for 2 months of mostly outdoor living.
Summers in NYC tend to be hot and humid. Working parents must either send their kids to camps or hire babysitters (could be more expensive). When kids are too young for camps, it could be especially hard on parents, as I quickly found out.
Luckily, someone suggested a “dacha”. I packed half of my apartment and the kid, and off to the woods I went.
Of course, I could not afford to spend the whole summer here, so we have arranged 2-weeks shifts with all the relatives we could find.
On dachas, kids and parents enjoy the company and freedom (there is no need to watch them every second, as they play in the meadows of an enclosed community, with plenty of friendly adults seeing their every move).
I fell in love with the lazy summer days by the lake, and could no longer contemplate a summer without dacha.
Of course, once my son was old enough for summer camp, we cut the season to a month (arranging shifts with relatives was too complicated), and for 3 weeks in August our son would shuttle daily to Nyak from NYC, where his day camp was located.
We could afford this kind of summer kid-care thanks to tax returns on my husband’s w-2 income. My business has been too tiny to afford anything like that.
Even though my husband and I separated 2 yrs ago, we kept filing jointly specifically for this purpose.
But as of this January, he has been laid off, and there are not going to be any tax returns for us next year.
I was coming this July to my little heaven in Catskills, knowing that this was to be the last time.
As my stay here began nearing the end (this Sunday we are leaving), I began to be more and more upset.
I was trying to imagine a summer with no dacha or summer camp:
My son would have to tag along to my work (and I work all over the city) every day. Of course, he would practice reading in Russian on the subway, and then quietly play his DS while I work, and then we would visit our park in the evening.
On weekends, we could go to beaches on Brighton Beach, Long Island or Staten Island. It would be hot, and the water would be cold and dirty…
It would be a very lonely summer for him (all his friends are going to be away on dachas and in camps, but life is life, right?
I thought about getting a dog to brighten his days, but how would we take a puppy to my work? – Scratch that…
Last night, thinking of all that, I could not sleep, so I went out on my porch to have a cigarette.
The lake at dawn was simmering, birds were having a big breakfast, while chirping away, and the beauty of all that was breath-taking.
“I cannot give this up”, I thought. “In fact, for years now my brain has been working over-time to find a way for me to live like that a year round.
This dacha is taylor-made for me by God: I’ve got the best view of the lake from my porch. I have a deck to do my yoga on. I can go for a swim without taking even a towel with me – my cottage is 25 feet from the incredible pristine spring water of this lake. People are great. My friends from NYC live on dachas a walking distance away. If I need company, it’s here; if I need solitude, I have it. I can work here. I have internet, and my cell is working here, so I can network and take orders.
And only $3,000 stand between this, and a 2-months torture for me and my son. This is not a big money. $3,000 can buy 10 days on Bagamas, 1 week of skiing in Catskills, or 1 month here. I am certain that just like God found this perfect place for me, He can find this money for me too.”
I prayed, and peace came upon me. That minute I knew, that I should leave a deposit for the next year. My Universe is kind. It knows no recessions, and is always ready to supply all my needs. This is what I beleve, and this is what I shall have.
Posted in enlightenment, spirituality | Tagged: Catskills, child-care, economy, Faith, God, kids, kind Universe, laid off, money, recession, spirituality, summer, tax returns, taxes, unemployment, vacation, worry | 6 Comments »
ABOUT HAPPINESS
Posted by Ella Moss on June 1, 2009
I’ve been pondering lately about happiness. Every human being wants this elusive state of existence. A few get it, but only for a short time. The rest of our lives we spent waiting for it, working for it, chasing it…
Literal translation of the word “happiness” from Russian (my native language) into English means “bringing all parts together”. Happiness is so elusive a state because there are so many parts to it: physical well-being, material well-being, emotional well-being and spiritual well-being.
Having it all at once is truly rare. That is because we are complex beings, consisting of Spirit, ego (self, persona), and physical body. Satisfying all 3 is not easy, as often their needs are contradictory, or, at, least, they appear to be so.
I’d say, much in life that we take for granted as a fact is a mere appearance of such, while the true reality is missing from the view. It is as if we are looking at life through a rear view mirror. Some objects may be closer than they seem, and some we may miss entirely as there is a blind spot.
This rear-view mirror is our ego. It is an intricate magic mirror that is alive like everything else in the Universe, and it is colored with many unique qualities, characteristics and sensitivities it has been endowed since birth.
Yet, as our Spirit peers at it in order to gauge the Earthly reality, It forgets that the ego is just a reflection. Like Alice in Wonder Land, it steps into the mirrored reality and assumes that the reflected world is the real one.
But a mirror is a mirror is a mirror. What appears to be far, is actually near and vice versa sometimes. Right is left, and left is right. God appears beyond reach, while He is The Nearest. Many imagine Him as an unseen yet omniscient Big Brother or an Administrator, whose favor we must earn. Some don’t feel worthy of His favor and don’t even bother asking. Some deny His existence altogether.
Yet God is the key ingredient of our happiness. Spiritual well-being is not possible without Him, because He is the Spirit. Denying God, or, at least, His Presence, is denying our own true nature.
Yes, I am blessed knowing Him (or Her – it’s the same), that is why I feel competent writing about Him. Long ago, when I was a 13 y.o. unhappy young girl looking for a meaning of life, God came into my life through series of revelations and never left. Or, rather, I’ve spotted Him in the rear-view mirror and never took my eyes off Him.
I still remember how the world felt without His Presence: it was a lonely, unkind, cold place, full of lonely scared people. My Spirit, like theirs, looked at the magic mirror of the Ego and did not see Itself. It saw existence which was virtually pointless, as it’s true nature was missing from the view. The Ego saw itself totally disconnected from the rest of the world. It was tiny and insignificant, helpless and terrified – like a 3 y.o. who was suddenly orphaned.
Many spiritual books we read say that we should deny our Ego (the little self) in order to achieve the spiritual well-being.
But our magic mirror is alive and it is a part of us on the Earthly plane. So, if we deny it, we deny any possibility of happiness to ourselves just as much as when we forget the Spirit, while staring into it without seeing.
So we should comfort our Ego as well. We cannot truly be whole, if we deny any part of ourselves. We cannot truly express our nature, which is LOVE, if we don’t love ourselves. If you saw a 3 y.o lost, hungry, cold, scared and crying, would not you take care of that child? That is what you should do for yourself too: comfort yourself. You are the Spirit first. As such, you are part of God. As part of God, you are The Mother and Father to all creation, including your Ego (your persona, that has a gender, name and various other characteristics).
On the other hand, if a 3 y.o. is not satisfied with a scoop of ice-cream, a toy, and a new jacket you gave him, but, instead, drops on the floor, screaming and crying, because he wants all the ice-cream in the store, all the toys in the store, and a fur-coat off another child’s back, would you give in to his demands?
No? But many of us work hard for a second house, a third car, a tenth pair of pants, etc..
In fact, the books like “The Secret”, “The Power of Attraction”, etc. that promise prosperity to all who reads them are flying off the shelves.
Then, of course, there are some of us who practice “tough love”. Such people would leave that screaming brat on the floor and just leave for some ascetic Spartan existence off the electric grid. That works too: their Ego sobers up as quickly as any 3 y.o. would and starts dreaming instead of such simple pleasures as taking a bath once in a while.
I, personally, believe in balanced mothering: I tell my Ego, “I love you, darling, but I don’t want you to get sick from eating so much ice-cream. Not to mention, that you would become too fat to get into a nice little life I have created just for you.”
You would be surprised by how well Ego listens if you talk to it lovingly but firmly.
As a young child, I lived in an orphanage, because my parents were too busy divorcing each other. There was no one to parent me but me.
When I was 5 y.o., I did something I was strictly forbidden to do: I hid behind the large book-shelves standing by the wall. I did not know that the book-shelves were hiding steaming-hot radiators. I touched a radiator with the back of my hand and burned it immediately. In pain, I looked at my hand and saw the skin popping up like little red balloons.
I could not scream in fear of being punished, so instead I told myself firmly: “The pain should go away now and the skin must return back to normal.” And it did. Immediately.
Of course, if I knew it was the 2nd degree burn, and all its serious consequences, it would not have worked so well. That is why now I have much harder time curing myself: my Ego is much more educated now.
But it still listens to me, as it trusts my parenting. I am a kind, loving parent to myself. Sometimes, I can even be indulgent. But I know where to draw the line. Most importantly, I know how to talk to my self.
For example, I never say, “This person/ situation annoys me”. Instead, I say, “I am annoyed at this person / situation.” That is because I have no control over another person. I can only control myself. So if I am annoyed to the point that my Divine nature gets obscured in the magic mirror of the Ego, I can stop being annoyed. I know my Ego has other qualities besides annoyance. So why should I live in a raffled reality? I can tell my self to be patient instead. And I reward my self for consequent patience by focusing on something pleasant. For example, if I get annoyed at my 8 y.o. son and summon patience instead of annoyance, I reward my self by concentrating on how pleasant it is hugging my son. Immediately, all I feel is calm, joy, and whole a lot of love.
Of course, like everyone, I can be overcome with anger. My Ego may feel belittled or threatened, and it may take a while for my Spirit to gain control back. But I always know I will. Because I keep reminding my self that no one has such control over me that he/ she can make me angry. I am the one who got anger, and I am the one who can get rid off it.
Of course, if I consistently get angry at the same person, I should do my best to avoid that person as much as possible. Why should I destroy my body by consistently filling it with such strong negative emotions? I’d rather make that person much less visible in the rear-view mirror of my reality.
I also don’t think that it is beneath me to ask for help when I am overcome with negativity. God is the Parent of me the Spirit, and I know He is always there to help
like any good parent (and He is the best). Forgiveness is such a good antidote to anger, that I always ask for more. In reality, the way I see it, forgiveness is one of the important ingredients for emotional well-being.
Another important ingredient is kindness. The existence on the Earthly plane is not an easy one. So everyone here deserves kindness: rich and poor, villains and victims, for there is no one without a serious challenge to overcome. As the preacher in my church once said, “Kindness and kindred have the same root”. We all are kindred spirits in the mirrored wonder land. In the true reality of Spirit (remember that all you see is but a reflection in your Ego’s eyes), Giving is Receiving and vice versa. Because when we give without strings attached, just because we want to, we are enriched by the sense of well-being so much more than the person on the receiving end. In other words, when we give freely, we feed the Spirit; when we receive, we feed the Ego. Blessed be those who receive, for they give pleasure of kindness to others at their own expense.
How is that, you may ask, that the Mother Theresa, who dedicated herself to kindness was so perpetually depressed according to her diaries, if giving is supposed to make one feel good? Well, according to her diaries, she was not giving from her heart out of pure desire to help out. The string that she attached to her kindness was the reward of God’s presence. In her mind, she stroke a bargain: she would serve God as He asked, and he would extricate her from loneliness by His sweet presence. But God does not bargain, and when we are kind out of sense of duty, giving becomes a chore.
Those who are truly kind live in a kinder Universe, because the world we see is the reflection in the magic mirror of the Ego. So when we are truly kind, our kindness is reflected back to us through kindness of others to ourselves. The trick is not to expect that kindness back. If you don’t feel like giving –don’t!
One should be kind to the Ego too. Sometimes, when you REALLY like that blouse in a store window, you should give your self the pleasure of wearing it, even if you have to buy it with your rent money.
In fact, when you do so, while putting your rent-payment worries aside for a moment, you show your self that you trust the Universe enough to take care of your necessities.
Since the Ego is just a mirror (albeit the magic one), suddenly you would see a kinder Universe. For instance, you may scratch a lottery ticket and win for the first time, or IRS may discover that it owes you money – just enough to cover your rent. So enjoy that blouse!
Just don’t go overboard. Those Egos that are spoiled rotten can create a real mess out of your life. Treat your self as another child of yours. Every child needs and deserves love, care and discipline.
This brings me to another ingredient for happiness: loving one another. How does that relate to happiness?
Well, anyone who loves his child would tell you: there is no greater happiness. That is because we love our kids with no strings attached. When we make them happy, our hearts light up no less than theirs. Since they are born, we take care of their needs and do so freely. We truly don’t expect the same of them (could a baby bring you a glass of warm milk when you feel under the weather?). We celebrate the smallest of their achievements (she said her first word!!! / he actually grabbed a toy!!! he skied down the green slope on his own!!!) with more pride and joy that we could possibly do our own.
Imagine loving someone else (not your child) in the same way. That someone else would make you just as happy.
Unfortunately, that is a tall order. We don’t even love our dearest friends that much, because we expect something in return. Our Egos are babies that we carry inside, and they are so worried that there would be no one to care for them when they need to, because God is not reflected by their mirrors. He is obscured by the blind spot.
So we should remind our selves on daily basis, that we are His creations, and, if we manage to love our creations (our children, art projects, businesses, etc.) so much, imagine how much greater His love is for us!
So we may stop littering the Universe with our fears and worries, anger and resentment, which are invariably get reflected back to us via the mirrors of selves as bad situations, illnesses, pollution, global warming, economic collapses. We have to take a leap of faith and trust the unseen God to take care of us. We are not lost. God is always here, and we are so dear to Him. Every normal mother runs to her baby when he screams for her. Scream for God, and He would appear in your mirror. Then grab on to Him and don’t let go. Then your magic mirror would reflect you in God’s arms and nothing would be all that scary any more.
When you are no longer scared, it is so much easier to be kind and give from your heart. When you discover your kindness, the Universe reflects it back giving you even more joy. Little by little, you begin to realize how beautiful and precious this life is. It is no longer a scary lonely place. Happiness begins to be reflected everywhere, and it becomes easier and easier to catch its glimpse.
One just needs to adjust the focus of the Ego’s magic mirror. The problem is, the Spirit (the Divine part of ourselves) knows only immediate present, while the Ego can typically see only the past or the future. That’s why God falls into its blind spot – God is always present in the most immediate way! But we can train the Ego to focus on the present. We can stop for a second and really smell the flowers, experiencing them as fully as possible.
We can snuggle next to our loved one and enjoy that feeling of closeness if just for a second without any comments inside the head.
When we focus on the future, we invariably worry. Worries cloud the mirror, and all we begin to see is monsters.
Do we really need goals? Our lives go by while we strive to achieve them. When we finally do, we rarely enjoy the moment anyway, since the magic mirror of the Ego is already showing us the next one. In a sense, we spend our lives striving for something instead of living them. At the end, death evens all out anyway. As I keep telling my son:
“Winning is far from being everything. Unless you enjoy the process, winning is worthless.” In short, you’ve got to enjoy what you do when you are doing it. That is another crucial ingredient for happiness.
Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: emotional well-being, God, life, Love, material well-being, money, mother, physical well-being, spiritual well-being, worry | 6 Comments »
2 MORE LIGHTS
Posted by Ella Moss on April 20, 2009
1.
She was down on her luck:
Her husband left, she was laid off.
Then a marshal came and saw her off.
She put her possessions in a plastic bag,
And holding onto her son’s little hand,
She walked off to the world’s farthest end.
And there she found a place to laid down,
At the very edge of the town.
She gave her son potato chips
(That’s all she could afford).
Then she dag into her bag and got out her coat.
She placed it on the ground
(Thank God, no one was around),
And made a pillow out of the bag.
“Tonight we are sleeping on this magic rug”,
She said to her child and snuggled up next to him.
And the breeze went quiet,
And the street light dimmed.
She sang to her child a lullaby:
“Shash, little baby, don’t you cry
Jesus Christ loves you and so do I”
Breathing in the sweet smell of his hair.
With her heart filled with love to the brim,
She thought, “Nothing better can be out there”
And, thank God, it is totally free!…”
2.
She looked at the stars: they were many and bright,
And she hugged her child so tender yet tight,
As the coat lift them up to the sky.
There an angel stopped by
The coat and gave them the sweetest of smiles.
He knew them by name and they talked for a while.
Then he said, hugging the child:
“These stars that you see are reflections of lights
That reside within each human heart.
By kindness of others they’re kindled this bright.
That is where Divinity starts.
What you see is the very image of God -
Every human’s inherited right.
When kindness lights up one person’s heart,
Everyone gets a little more light.”
And He added, while sending back
to the ground her magic rug:
“What you think of yourself being down on luck
is really you giving someone a chance
to brighten his heart with kindness for once”.
3.
Startled and suddenly cold, she woke up
and saw a man standing by the bus stop.
Let this story be truthfully told,
he was old, decrepit, short, fat and bald.
Their eyes’ve met, and he said with a laugh:
“Were you waiting here all night for the bus?”
“No. This is my place”.
“That must be tough.
Your hubby should get you a roof that lasts”,
And he laughed some more, enjoying his own joke.
“My husband left”, she said, folding her rug.
And they went quiet, both taken back
To the time when their hearts broke.
His was many a year ago,
When he and his wife fought for months in a row.
Then he left her and his son,
taking off after the setting Sun.
Since life was easier with feelings gone,
he never needed again anyone,
and that worked out just fine.
But now, as he looked at her boy, golden hair and all,
he thought of his kid and felt a jolt.
So he surprised himself with the following words:
“Come along. I need help with my pizza place.
And for that I would give you the room and board.
So what do you say?”
She said, “Yes”.
4.
And that is how it came to be that she got a job and a place to stay.
And that is how it is to this day.
She waits on his tables, she cooks and cleans.
She is always smiling. He always looks mean.
But he pays her cash and buys her son toys,
And seeing them smile makes his heart leap with joy.
5.
Then one day he got very sick
And spent in a hospital more than a week.
When he came out, he told her, “I’m old.
I can measure the rest of my life in days.
I’ve got to put my affairs in order.
Please, look after my place,
While I’m gone.
I’ve got to find my son.”
And that’s what he did.
He saw his son
From across the street,
while sitting in the van,
Then through a hole in the fence,
Then through a window at night.
His son was a handsome man,
Tall, with hair wavy and light.
He had a wife and 2 young kids.
He liked cars and had a tooth for sweets.
And, as he saw his son through a window at night,
Putting his kids to bed,
Kissing them on the forehead,
The old man cried.
Then he turned around and was walking back to his van.
That is when he heard the voice of his son:
“Hey! What’s up with you, man?!
You’ve been stalking me all day long!”
“I’m sorry”, his dad said, “I was wrong.
I was wrong leaving you and your mom
To fend for yourselves.
I was numb.
I was numb all these years.
I have wasted my life on money and stuff.
But I’m glad you’re making alright with your life
Right from the start.
Remember, my son, to be kind to your wife,
For kindness keeps the joy in your heart.
It makes men feel better than many a dollar.
Sometimes it requires of men real valor.
But that’s what it takes to become a man.
You can have no respect for yourself until then.
And I’m sorry I was not a man enough.
So you’d better take care of the kids and the wife.
Don’t worry about the stuff.”
And, swallowing tears,
he opened the van’s door.
“I’m sorry”, he repeated,
“that I could not be more…
That I was not more kind..”
And he disappeared
into the night.
His son went back to the house, scratching his head:
“What was that?!…Was it my dad?!..”
His wife stood by the kitchen sink,
When he asked her to fix him a drink.
Then he saw the tiredness set in her eyes,
And he thought of his dad telling him to be kind.
He hugged her and kissed, and said with surprise:
“Let me do the dishes tonight”.
Posted in poetry | Tagged: bad luck, children, economy, Faith, family, God, Jesus, kindness, life, Love, money, mother, parenting, poetry, spirituality, women | 9 Comments »
VENUS RETROGRADE
Posted by Ella Moss on March 21, 2009
On March 7, I was about to e-mail 1 piece of information to someone in my business network and go to bed. It was almost 11 PM.
But I could not find a file. That was a very important file, so I was searching for it all over, getting more and more upset.
As I was doing that, my file cabinet toppled over and broke to pieces, with papers flying all over the room. But I found what I was looking for.
It was simply misfiled.
All night long I was refiling my documents, and, as I was doing it, I was re-thinking my business – or, rather, the way I was doing it.
Ever since I’ve lost my major client on 10/25/07, I’ve been working on different avenues of expansion.
In slightly more than a year, I’ve got quite a few of them. So, while sifting through papers through the night, I finally realized that I was overwhelmed. If I don’t hire someone now, most of my efforts would go to waste, as I cannot follow up on all those leads and do my core work, and be the mother that I want to be to my child. Thank God for falling cabinets!
And thank God for Venus going retrograde.
When a planet goes retrograde (i.e. appearing to go backwards in the sky), we have the opportunity to re-think / re-do whatever that planet represents generally and in our personal horoscopes.
Venus deals generally with what we value. This means money, beautiful things, and, of course, this applies to people we value.
So we get the chance to revalue our important relationships as well.
That is why times when Venus retrogrades are littered with all kinds of painful break-ups.
In my chart, Venus also represents my business, and, invariably, every time it retrogrades, I dream of new ways of doing business.
As an astrologer, however, I know not to start anything new or make permanent changes until it goes direct again. That is when the world sobers up, and our re-thought values get the reality check.
Meanwhile, the world is drank with dreams and nightmares. Everyone is rocking the boat, and a few will fall over.
From 4/17 until 5/20 we are going to be re-thinking our revaluations, and the time to take definitive action would be the end of May. That when our vision finally gets corrected, and we can see straight.
Meanwhile, I will talk to a few people, see if that is the right way to go, see if they are right for me. I may even give them a try before 5/20. I may also decide to simply drop a few projects, and concentrate on those that are ready to be milked. I will also get me a new filing cabinet.
Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: relationships, retrograde planet, timing, Venus, Venus retrograde | 2 Comments »
New Economy, or Buy American, Stupid!
Posted by Ella Moss on February 20, 2009
So, the new stimulus package is passed, hopes are up, markets are down, and recession deepens. Everyone is blaming the housing market, unscrupulous bankers and inept previous administration.
But very few seem to understand the true roots of our woes, and how deep our economic problems go.
Believe me, the trillion dollar stimulus is but a bandaid on a very deep wound!
Everyone is stuck with the 20th century economic model:
an entrepreneur discovers a need->manufactures solution->gets rich->creates demands->someone else fulfills those demands->gets rich->creates more demands->those who supply solutions get rich too->created jobs create more jobs->society gets richer and richer
This is the 21st century global economics model:
manufacturers/suppliers find cheaper workforce in a poor country->enrich that country->the workforce gets more expensive->the suppliers go to another cheaper country->previous producing countries get poorer, their workforce immigrates to a new labor market->wages stagnate or get lower->more labor markets get poorer->no one can afford the supplies anymore->manufacturers go bust->everyone gets even poorer.
If you don’t believe me, here’s a news bit on Ireland. Ireland was in great demand as a labor market, because people spoke English, were educated, yet asked for much lower wages than UK or American workers. The labor market there was so hot, that Polish and other poorer EU brethren immigrated to Ireland.
But the workers grew too expensive in Ireland as economy there heated up, so the companies left for cheaper labor markets like Poland. Now Irish workers immigrate to Poland. But they no longer get the same wages. Living expenses are cheaper in Poland for now, so it makes some sense. Once Polish economy booms, however, and living expense there goes, accordingly, up, Poland would face the same economic bust, as now does Ireland.
India was also a popular labor market. But they started asking for too much money, so China became a place to be for manufacturers.
Lately, however, the “smart” manufacturers have been migrating to Africa.
Where does it leave the U.S. – the original place of labor migration?
I found an article in one of the New York’s free newspapers (Metro is it?) that the U.S. stills manufactures 65% of its products domestically (down from the 20th century’s 80%).
But it does not say, that the domestic wages went up. Because for the past 7 – 8 years they have not. Domestic salaries have not increased either. In fact, many went down. Because our labor force now competes for wages with Irish, Polish, Indian, Chinese, Mexican and other labor forces of the world.
The only market that saw increase in the U.S. in the past 8 years was the housing market, as speculators (flippers, real estate and mortgage brokers) kept pushing the prices up to the point of unaffordability by the impoverished middle class (the domestic labor force).
The feeling of prosperity that bubble has created had no base in reality. That feeling was based on the ease of credit (future income of financial sector ->future prosperity), which was given on a funny assumption that housing prices would continue to rise as wages have historically done so, affording better prices.
But our wages could no longer support our consumption on easy credit, hence prices and credit crunch.
No matter where our income was coming from, its sources were disappearing or getting smaller at best.
Not only manufacturing was leaving America, services were too.
Web design, translations, document processing, customer service – all were becoming outsourced. When was the last time you have heard a customer service representative on the other end of the phone that did not speak with an Indian accent?
People in this country that specialized in the services that were now easily outsourced could no longer ask for wage increase, if they were to be kept employed.
In the 21st century, the labor market is global. That means, the wages for the same services performed would eventually average out. If a Russian translator in the U.S. asks now for $.14/word, and a Russian translator in Siberia asks now for $.05/wd for the same job, eventually they will all go down to $.05/wd. If a worker at a Chrysler plant in Detroit asks for $35/hr, and a worker at a Chrysler plant in Mexico asks for $5/hr, eventually they will all ask for $5/hr – because it is natural for any company to seek out a cheaper labor.
Since the impoverished global workforce is not going to be able to afford $30,000 cars and $300,000 homes, those prices will go down too -unless they are artificially held high by governments’ bailouts. But bailouts cannot continue indefinitely. So the prices will continue to deflate in accordance with deflated average incomes. Middle class is going to disappear (it may take a few decades), unless the governments would wake up and set up some protection.
No, not trade protection – that is passe. It is the labor markets that must be protected, if we don’t want to go back to the economy we used to have throughout 10th – 19th centuries – the economy of a few very rich, and the rest being very poor indeed.
But I am not stupid enough to expect our government (or any other for that matter) to step in with labor force protection. Besides, the ease and cheapness of global communication and travel would create serious obstacles to any attempt to create such protection.
The only thing that may protect our domestic labor force is the consumer movement. Just as our demand for green products has eventually created green industries, our demand for products made in America may protect domestic work force..to some extent.
Incidently, when was the last time you saw something made in America in a store?
Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: credit crunch, economy, global economy, global work force, made in America, payroll tax, predictions, recession, trickle-down economics, unemployment | 7 Comments »
PLUTO – THE GREAT LEVER OF POWER
Posted by Ella Moss on December 30, 2008
As Pluto is entering Capricorn now, where it is going to wreck all structures of our lives for the next 15 years, I’ve decided to write a little tribute to this planet.
In order to truly understand what it is doing to our lives, we have to look a little deeper at the Reality Core of our Selves.
In some computer games, like “Second Life”, for instance, the players create an “Avatar” for themselves in order to participate in the virtual reality of that game. The “Avatar” is the character they play there. The players choose its body frame, features and characteristics, and then behave accordingly to that character in the game’s virtual reality.
I believe that we, as Spiritual Beings, do the same, when entering The Great Game of Life on Earth. Our “Avatar”, the human persona we assume, is defined by the planetary picture active at the time and place of our birth.
That planetary picture, otherwise known as horoscope, create energies that form our bodies and psychological perceptions of life.
It also contains the synopsis of our life stories and their time line.
We become the heroes of our life stories, which Karma – The Game Master – incorporates into The Great Epic of Life on Earth by interweaving different strands of one life story with those of many others.
Why do we play this game? There are many answers to choose from. But the ultimate goal of each player, it seems, is to slay his or her own “Avatar” we call Ego, thus conquering the virtual reality of Life on Earth and reclaiming our Divinity.
Rarely this victory happens in one life time. In fact, The Game is designed to offer as many opportunities as necessary, hence – reincarnation.
But each individual life contains within its story such possibility. Each planet in the horoscope functions not only as a layer of the virtual persona we wear and the timer of the “Avatar’s” story line, but also as a Spiritual Reality Lever. We just need to solve its riddle, while playing the “Avatar”.
Let’s take Pluto, for instance. This planet on the outskirts of the Solar System is so tiny, that it was recently demoted by astronomers from the planetary status altogether. Yet it acts as our Power Archetype. All our ideas regarding power, whether Divine or human, stem from that archetype. Pluto’s position in a chart, and its interconnection with other planets there via aspects and rulerships defines the perceptions of power by the “Avatar” (i.e. the human persona we wear in a particular life) and it offers us lessons in power throughout the life story.
The solution to the riddles of its lessons (which tend to be excruciating in their level of pain) is to find the power within, which would lead us to the liberation from the Ego.
Any person that lived through Plutonian transit and survived to tell the tale would attest to the mightiness of this tiny planet’s punch. Astrologers call it the planet of death and rebirth for good reason. Under its transit, we all must let a part of our “Avatar” die a very painful death, and then find the strength within to either carry on emotionally maimed or to be spiritually reborn and take our life story on another level.
You may say that Pluto acts as a catalyst of our human lives. Its energy has a certain obsessive-compulsive quality. It is inward oriented, compelling us to dig within ourselves all the way down to our Spiritual Roots, so we could find the power of our Spirit and raise our Kundalini. Kundalini is our Real Power that lays dormant in our Root Chakra, until it is awakened. Once awakened, it rises straight to the Crown Chakra, issuing great heat within the spine that burns down layers of the “Avatar” and, if the player is ready, takes him or her onto the next level of The Game. If player is not ready, real physical death results. That is the Lever of Consciousness that Pluto operates.
People, whose natal Pluto aspects or rules their Sun, Moon, or any other planet for that matter, exhibit Pluto’s obsessive-compulsive behavior in the aspected planets’ domains of reality.
For instance, people, whose Moon is touched by Pluto, either via an aspect or by the virtue of being placed in Scorpio – the sign of Pluto’s rulership, have certain obsessive quality to their emotional make-up. They would continue to emotionally focus on a subject that once stirred their emotions, until they find the power within to transform their emotional picture.
People, whose Venus is colored by Pluto, have obsessive likes and dislikes, and their human relationships take on the obsessive quality as well. Again, inner transformation is the key to solve their relationship puzzles.
Since Pluto rules Scorpio, Plutonian characteristics are most visible in qualities of planets that fall into that sign. Scorpio’s element is water, which possesses natural receptive and retentive qualities. It makes us highly sensitive to environmental stimula. Scorpio’s mode is fixed (the water is still), so it is doubly retentive. The environmental impressions are retained by the native and have no place to go (i.e cannot leave the psyche). Pluto, with its obsessive-compulsive inward oriented energy, compels the native to compulsively focus on a particular impression year after year, until the native’s attitude towards it is transformed.
Just to give you an example, I know of one Scorpio Moon lady, whose husband of 5 years once made a cutting remark regarding her figure as she gained a few pounds following the birth of their daughter. She loved her husband dearly all these years, so as offended as she was, she did not rush to file for divorce. In fact, by all accounts (including her husband’s), they continued to have a good marriage for another 5 years, until she got pregnant with the second child. Then, suddenly, she decided that the marriage was over. When pressed for a reason, she confessed that the cutting words of her husband continued to play in her head year after year, until her love for him was transformed into hate. So after 10 years of marriage and 2 children together, she left him despite facing significant financial perils and obvious difficulties of being a single mother of 2 young children.
This, of course, is a negative example of love being transformed into hate. But the same Plutonian qualities allow us to transform hate into love and forgiveness. Until this transformation occurs, the natives continue to obsess about their impressions. The more painful the impression is, the more natives would focus on it, until their very psyche is transformed together with the impression. Scorpio has a certain penchant for pain, perhaps because painful experiences are the ones that prompt us to seek Spiritual Reality behind the virtual mirrors of Maya.
Wherever Scorpio is found on a house cusp of a horoscope, that is where we seek experiences that are most challenging, difficult and painful. But the greater is their challenge, the more we appreciate them.
But it is the astrological house location of Pluto itself, where we are called to slay the Dragon of the fairytale of our life. That astrological house is the area of life where we have to master all our strength to face the challenges. That is because we give our inner power, our strength, away to the concerns of that area of life. Those matters terrify us so deeply, or we attach ourselves to them so much, that they begin to control us. Our task is to get that control back by slaying the shadowy dragon of our greatest insecurities or most strangling attachments. The issues of power play of any sort only surface when we give our power to someone or something outside of ourselves.
If Scorpio is also on the cusp of that house, the challenges would double in difficulty and the Dragon would have many heads.
If expansive Jupiter is aspecting Pluto by conjunction, square or opposition, or if Pluto conjoins the North Node, the many-headed Dragon will be of immense proportions.
But even if Pluto is all alone, it would still belly our greatest insecurities.
In the first house of self-image, it compels the natives to uphold their sef-image at any cost. Rumor goes that Prince Charles, who holds this Pluto position, requires his lovers, Camilla including, to address him “Your Highness” even in the middle of love-making.
God forbid, you would openly disagree with a Pluto-in-the-first-house person. He or she would level you with the ground. That is because these people feel that it is them against the world. So they put on the iron mask of their opinions and bravely march on regardless of what stands in their path.
Their one-on-one relationships tend to be their main casualties. Only when the natives stop seeing the world as their greatest threat and realize that it is merely the projection of their own mind, they slay their dragon.
If you have Capricorn in the first house, transiting Pluto is going to transform your self-image, and your relationship with the world. Personal relationships, particularly marriages and partnerships of all kinds will undergo irrevocable change as well.
When Pluto is in the second house of our personal independence, the natives’ constant struggle tends to be for their own survival. Trying to fend for themselves is their challenge. At the same time, the natives abhor any kind of dependence on others. They put most of their energy into building the house of cards they call “material security”. But even if one day they may feel they made it, Pluto would pull the rug from under their feet, so they would have to start all over again. All their lives they fight for survival, until they summon their inner power and shine the light of their spirit on the dragon – just to discover that it is nothing but the shadow of their deep mistrust into benevolence and generosity of the Universe.
Pluto transiting through this area of life would create riches-to-rugs and rugs-to-riches stories worthy of 15 minutes of fame.
Pluto in the third house of our mental and physical functioning gives the natives the gift of deeply probing mind, capable of great concentration and laser-sharp focus. These natives cannot stand mysteries of any kind and have to find the answer to all their questions. By obsessively focusing on the subject of their quest until the light of their spirit shines the light on it.
But then the natives would struggle to communicate their discoveries to others, as the third house is also the house of communication. Whether it is writing, public speaking or acting, the natives find communication challenging – yet either unavoidable or unobtainable.
Sometimes, the very physical functioning may become the natives’ greatest challenge, especially if Mars or Uranus make stressful aspects to their Pluto. Paralysis, loss of limbs or other severe physical disabilities would become the natives’ dragon.
And, of course, the natives tend to suffer from constant transportation problems, because the third house is also about how we get from here to there.
Perhaps, the natives’ true dragon is the inability to percieve that their spirit acts no matter what their body/ mind is capable of physically.
As Pluto transits through the third house, the natives’ learning / communicating or the very functioning within their environment becomes very difficult. Accidents that impair them in some way are possible. Yet it is the transformation of their general philosophy that will be transiting Pluto’s most lasting gift.
The greatest challenge of the natives with Pluto in the fourth house is their family and / or nation. Mom also may be the most challenging person in these natives’ lives, as their mothers tend to be controlling, manipulative, and, sometimes, even abusive.
Housing problems may be consistently painful.
But primary issue is likely to be whom / where the natives belong with. The fourth house is the house of our psychological roots. It supposes to be the area of life where we feel at home and can let our hair down. But the natives are never able to “let their hair down”, until their dragon is slain. That is when they discover where they truly belong: the Spirit.
As Pluto transits this house in a chart, home and family problems become severe enough to affect the person’s career and social status.
The fifth house is the house of fun, children, creativity, games and romance. Well, Pluto here takes all the fun out of the process. Having children is going to be a great challenge one way or another; love is peppered with heart-breaks of immense proportions; even the very fun and games are never simply fun and games for the natives. These people keep fighting their dragon even while playing.
The natives tend to be deeply creative, or, rather, deeply obsessed about their creativity – which automatically makes any creative process uncomfortable and turns it into a struggle instead of joy.
Unless these natives slay their dragon of taking life too seriously, they cannot even enjoy their existence!
Pluto moving into this area of life via transit, would transform the natives heart with many lasting gifts to follow (children / great Love/ great creations/ etc.). But expect the transformation to be a painful process. Also, expect your social life to suffer meanwhile.
Pluto in the sixth house challenges our very ability to maintain our life as we know it either through dreadful diseases or terrible work issues. Office politics may be the natives’ greatest foo.
No matter how these natives appear on the surface, they tend to be severely maladjusted. You can say that their sheer will-power (Pluto) moves them through life.
Interestingly, that very will-power is what is required of them in order to overcome such dragons as cancer, HIV or problematic work conditions. Once they discover that they can bend life to their will instead of bending themselves to life’s demands, they have slayed their dragon.
Pluto transiting through this house may cause prolonged unemployment or torturous work conditions, severe health issues, problems with domestic animals or employees.
Natal Pluto in the seventh house of our one-on-one relationships challenges the natives by handing them a very powerful / manipulative spouse / business partner or enemy. Often, the natives spend large chunks of their lives in courts, fighting a Gallayah.
The natives’ very sense of self is challenged in their battles with the world. Only when they expand their sense of self into the spiritual realm, they may slay their dragon.
When Pluto transits this house, it devours our relationships or transforms them completely. Some gain an enemy, some are taken through the slow wheels of court system. One way or another, neither our self-image nor our relationship with the world would ever be the same after Pluto plows through this area of life.
The eighth house Pluto tends to be the most abusive, perhaps, because it is its natural placement. Here natives must struggle with physical/ mental/ sexual abuse or its consequences for most of their lives. This often becomes literally a do-or-die issue for them, especially if Mars, Uranus or North Node make challenging aspects to this Pluto (conjunctions to Pluto are always challenging by the way).
Just look at Princess Diana’s story: throughout all her adult life she suffered from mental abuse by her husband (in her eyes, anyway – but that’s what matters), and it is very unclear (to a non-astrologer) if she died on account of accident or murder.
She, by the way, had her Pluto conjunct Mars, Uranus and North Node.
Besides abuse, the natives also have to often contend with problems arising from issues of inheritance/ debt/ taxes/ insurance/ surgeries/ sexually transmitted diseases or tragic deaths.
But it is their dependency on others that is likely to be most painful challenge.
The natives’ dragon would keep on breathing fire, until the natives take their power back from the abusers.
Tragedy may visit when Pluto transits this house. Other people’s finances should be handled with utmost care, and personal finances should not be trusted to others, as your finances may suffer drastically. Pay all your taxes or be very sorry. Be careful of falling prey to others’ power play.
The world has been facing issues of Pluto in the ninth house for the last 12 years, since the time this planet firmly entrenched itself in Sagittarius – the natural ninth house placement of Zodiac. In the ninth house, we experience matters of faith / beliefs and expansion of our horizons through either media, foreign travel or higher studies.
In these 12 years, the world has gotten considerably smaller than it has ever been, thanks to proliferation of internet, cell phones and internet-based phones (such as Vonage, Skype, etc.), and through aggressive pursuit of global economy (outsourcing).
But the world has also become more divided than ever. With Berlin Wall gone, and the cold war being seemingly over, we’ve got now Muslims pitched against Christians, Jews, and Hindus in the war of terror that is global and amorphous, with no clear boundaries except the human mind.
It is the human mind that becomes Pluto’s playground, when it finds itself in the ninth house of a natal chart. The natives begin to obsess over their philosophy of life (i.e. faith/ religion/ etc.). Fanaticism is another word for such obsession. It comes from the need to control the large world outside, which seems very scary and threatening to the natives. Their greatest challenge is upholding their beliefs at the expense of open-mindedness, and their greatest trauma occurs when their world-view collapses for one reason or another.
They cannot slay their dragon until they untangle their intent (Pluto) from their beliefs, and they cannot do that until at first they slay the dragon of their fear of the world.
When Pluto transits the ninth house, the natives undergo dramatic changes in their beliefs, and many may give away their power (Pluto) to a chosen point of view. On the other hand, some may become liberated from suffocating dogmas that were ruling their lives prior to Pluto’s visit. New exciting learning may take place, and some dragons will disappear as shadows.
Pluto in the tenth house makes fun of the natives’ ambitions. The natives would struggle like no others to get their spot under the Sun. But even if they manage to get there, the finally achieved spotlight would be slowly and painfully killing them. Whether getting a societal position or keeping it would be the natives’ greatest challenge.
The dragon here, however, is the ambition itself, or the shadow of the natives’ domineering father, to whom they continuously try to prove themselves.
As Pluto transits this house, careers would be drastically change, businesses might be lost, powerful would become pariahs and vice versa. This, of course, would bring painful changes into the natives’ home and families.
In the eleventh house, Pluto makes us painfully famous or infamous, betrays us through trusted friends, and makes those who loves and admires us hate and despise us. Friendships for the natives seem to be the breeding ground for power struggles.
Wherever our ambition takes us in life, we either would never know the fruits of our labor, or we might find out these fruits to be deadly poisonous, when Pluto challenges us from the eleventh house.
The dragon here is the attachment to fruits of our labor. Slaying this dragon would take us a good step closer to the main goal of The Great Game of Life: spiritual emancipation.
When Pluto merely visits this hous via transit, friendships will be broken, good will lost or found, businesses may lose their value, children and lovers may betray us. But, the harder our hearts get broken, the more they might open. The more they open, the more creativity pours out. Moreover, within our painfully opened hearts, we might discover the Light of our Divine Essence.
When natal Pluto is in the 12th house, the natives may find themselves confined either within their own mind, hunted by monstrous secrets, or in jail, a hospital bed, or exile. It could be all of the above, as in the case of O.J. Simpson.
Over the course of their lives, the natives would slay one shadow dragon within their mind after another, until they slay the greatest dragon of them all – the illusion of our separateness.
After all, the 12th house is where our Spirit hides all the secrets of the Real Universe from our virtual minds. Pluto there is the dragon that guards them. Slay that dragon, and you are free.
Until then, you find yourself in a prison of one kind or another.
Transiting Pluto may liberate us by imposing physical confines, or imprison us by terrible secrets. Life never is going to be the same after its visit into the closet of our lives, as it certainly going to change or break the lock on it.
Posted in Uncategorized | 7 Comments »
THE GREAT VARIABLE OF FREE WILL
Posted by Ella Moss on November 17, 2008
In August, as soon as I got Obama’s birth data, I looked up the charts of presidential candidates, and picked McCain as a clear winner. Was it a terrible misread, as one comment suggested? Maybe. After all, I am still learning Vedic astrology which I used to make this prediction. Shiva, on the other hand, correctly predicted the land-slide win for Obama.
If it was a misread on my part, I am only happy about it. Not only because I wholeheartedly voted for Obama myself, but also because I am entering my Sun / Jupiter dasa now. Born in 1961, like our president-elect and Princess Diana, I also have debilitated Jupiter in my Rasi.
In my navamsa chart, however, my Jupiter is relatively strong (just as in Obama and Diana’s charts) and conjunct my Sun to boot.
So, if Shiva was right, I should have an influx of so needed money soon (the Sun is my money planet in my Vedic chart).
Unfortunately, so far, I have misread my own Vedic chart. For years, I’ve been expecting to make my fortune during my Sun dasa, which began in 2007. Instead, almost as soon as it began, I have practically lost my business, and have been in the worst financial shape since my student years.
Like in Obama’s chart, my debilitated Jupiter makes great yogas (connections), and, by position, promises me greatness and riches. So, WHERE ARE THEY?!
Instead, every time, my Jupiter’s sub-dasa comes around, misery abounds.
Princess Di’s Vedic chart features the same unfortunate Jupiter, whose Mahadasa she entered soon after her marriage to Prince Charles.
Although we all know how unhappy her marriage was, her engagement and the wedding were her happiest times according to all biographies. Those occurred at the very end of her Rahu Mahadasa.
The misery of her marriage commenced with the beginning of her debilitated Jupiter’s mahadasa, and she died at the very end of that period, even though in Navamsa that Jupiter is relatively strong (as is mine and Obama’s).
According to Shiva’s logic, she should have married during her Jupiter mahadasa and enjoyed the ride that followed. According to my logic, all that have occurred during Princess Di’s life was timed astrologically in the most perfect way.
On the other hand, if my logic is so right, how come Obama won?
The answer may be in the most unpredictable variable: human free will.
Let’s start with Obama’s example:
From the very beginning, he was the favorite of Almighty Media – which annoyed me, since he was my least favorite of the candidates. I liked everything Hillary stood for, except for leaving Iraq – the country we’ve destroyed. My vote of conscience went with McCaine who promised to re-build it, even though I have been a devoted democrat since Clinton’s “impeachment” debacle. So I was “the undecided” for most of the campaign.
Meanwhile, I’ve began to encounter people (mostly, black) who staked so much hope on Obama’s candidacy that I began to wish for Obama’s win for their sake. It would have been too cruel to burst their bubble. I have never seen people to stake so much of their heart in any election.
I have also began to be aware that most of the outside world prayed for Obama’s win: African countries, Muslim countries – they all saw him as their own: the skin color, the Muslim ancestry and experience. Half of European hearts was beating for Obama as well, as he represented the liberal face of America as opposed to much-hated Bush.
Then the financial crisis came 2 month earlier then I expected, and I myself began to pray that Obama would win, as McCain’s economic stance began to scare me.
So, did Obama win because he should have astrologically, or because 70% of the world’s population prayed that he would? If you know the answer to that, tell me!
Here’s another example:
Long time ago, when I was a successful practicing astrologer, a young man called me and requested the reading. I knew nothing about him. As usual, I’ve prepared his Western chart (at the time the only astrology I was practicing was the Western astrology), and deduced that he was an upcoming basketball player with great future ahead of him.
When he rang the door bell, and I opened the door, I mentally patted myself on the back: he was tall (above 6′3” for sure), athletically built, and black (forgive me, but we all know that white men cannot jump).
However, as reading unfolded, I found out that he was a high-school drop out, drifting through life with no directions. No basketball scholarship, no NBA in sight.
Of course, giving his tender age (around 20, if I remember right), he could still catch up to the success, promised in his chart. But it would be more difficult, since he got off his best path already.
It could be that I have misread his chart as well. But given that I was on target in all other cases, I think it was his free will variable that was at play.
I must also touch on another example of the “misread/ free will variable” in my history as a practicing astrologer:
When O.J. was arrested after the slow chase on a highway (was it 1994?), I have predicted to my students that he would go free based on his chart. His chart features a juicy, all powerful Jupiter at the apex of his chart and “rise high, land softly” kite configuration. Moreover, that Jupiter was surfing into the 4th house, where, according to traditional Western astrology I am such a fan of, it promises great old age. So I based my predictions on that Jupiter.
I was right, but not entirely, since more than 10 years later O.J. was arrested again, on a completely different matter, and convicted to spend the rest of his days in prison. Was the traditional Western astrology wrong, did I misread it, or was it O.J.’s guilty consciousness, coupled with the American public’s deep desire for justice, that undid his great golden years promise?
On 1/23 my Sun/Jupiter dasa would commence. Some great Vedic pundits say, I will make a windfall, some predict great misery. The way the economy is heading, the latter could be right. But I stake my life on the great variable of FREE WILL, which includes prayer from the heart, as well as human effort.
Since 10/25/07, the day I’ve lost my major client that constituted 90% of my tiny business, I’ve been working days and nights on my own economic recovery. After all, I am a single mom with an 8 y.o. in tow, and homelessness, starvation – all that I have already been through when I came into this country at the threshold of my Ketu Mahadasa – is no longer an option. I stake my life on the Miracle of answered prayer, whether $ is in my chart or not.
But I am not planning to shelf astrology either. To me, it is a map of life. A map always comes handy in gauging the best direction to follow. But it is the free will that motors us and takes us places.
Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: Add new tag, astrology, economy, elections, free will, Jupiter, ketu, mahadasa, McCain, media, miracle, money, O.J., Obama, prayer, Princess Diana, Sun | 6 Comments »
FIXING AMERICAN ECONOMY
Posted by Ella Moss on October 27, 2008
Like all of us, I’ve been listening for weeks now of how the presidential candidates are proposing to fix our economy. This morning, McCain came out with all his financial advisers with the statement on how he would do it.
Well, his proposal scares me. But Obama’s take on the economy does not make me feel any better either.
As I was washing dishes and doing laundry, I came up with the following thoughts:
1) HOUSING CRISIS has been long overdue. Only a simpleton would think that real estate prices would always go up and never come down. The market rules apply here, as everywhere else. Since most of the housing market caters to middle class, as soon as it reaches unaffordability level for middle class, it has to go bust. That is called “Market Correction”, and that is what happened. In any capitalist society, these corrections must be allowed, otherwise it would hurt somewhere else.
Both presidential candidates are proposing eliminating or severely decreasing capital gain tax. But once Reagan decreased capital gain tax, speculation in real estate and taxes went rampant, contributing to the sad state of affairs we find ourselves in now.
2) FINANCIAL CRISIS was brought on by derivatives trading, made illegal in 1907 and made legal again in 2000 (?!), as well as by indiscriminate lending (mortgage and credit cards alike) – that can be brought under control by government intervention and better rules and regulations of financial industry – which is underway. But some market correction should be allowed as well, otherwise the problems will continue.
When your tooth aches, you should take a painkiller. But if you are not going to fix it, painkillers would hurt you further with side-effects.
I would be glad to see that any credit is substantiated by income tax returns and is based on actual ability to pay it back. But I would also update usury laws, making it illegal to charge more than 15% for any type of loan.
3) RECESSION has been brought on by squeeze of the middle class as much as by anything else. Besides housing prices going down, medical, tuition and everyday living (food, transport, etc.) costs went up, while income stagnated or went down. Squeeze the middle class’ discretionary income, and you would get automatic recession.
Any capitalist economy depends on the financial health of the middle class, and that is where all economic fixes must start.
Since medical expenses are almost universally a major problem, I would go with universal health care.
But it should not hurt small business with extra taxes or mandates, as Obama proposes. That is like amputating the head when you’ve got a headache.
In fact, small business (which is also middle class) already suffers from too many taxes and mandates.
Why would I hire an employee, if that means I have to add 50% expense to the employee’s wages via payroll tax, work-comp insurance, liability insurance, etc.??? I’d rather get me an independent contractor, who would do the same work for the same wage amnt, and save me $, paper-work and headache.
So how the universal medical insurance would be paid? Well, so many states already have good working models: Vermont, New York (health plus), etc.
On top of it, we have SSI model. So why not add Universal Medical Insurance to the income tax, and collect that tax in the specific UMI fund?
Moreover, as the main insurer, the government would be able to keep prescriptions and other costs down.
Granted, this would create a medical industry crisis. But I would rather take out the rotting tooth than kill my liver by constant intake of painkillers.
I would also do the same income tax special funds for unemployment and work-comp insurances and make them optional. Let it be the employee’s choice, rather then the employer’s problem.
In fact, I would eliminate social security altogether, and, instead, create livable pension fund where people are able to retire at the age of 70 keeping the same annual income level as shown on their last income tax return, and I would pay for it via the same optional contribution to the special Pension fund, collected via income tax. This way, our pensions will be our own responsibilities, and no employer will go bankrupt on that account. But we all would feel so much safer, knowing our retirement does not disappear in the bear stock market.
On the other hand, if one does not contribute to those optional funds, and something goes wrong – tough! It should not become the society problem.
I would also do the same with college tuition fund, doubling the taxable amount with each additional child. Then I would expect my child to be able to attend any college that accepts him based on his grades without extra tuition costs that may bankrupt me.
I would do the same with school tuition with the state income tax, and would add universal after-school care fund to that. This way, all public schools in a state would get equal funding, and there would be no additional costs for babysitters, extra-curriculum classes, etc.. Now, if you don’t have children, or your children have grown, you don’t have to contribute to that fund. I would, because these costs are now crippling my personal economy.
There should also be mandatory but separate funds within income tax for
defense
law & order
infrastructure
emergencies
general upkeep
foreign debt
etc
Then we would know where our money goes, and hopefully then such funds as foreign debt would become unnecessary (as we would not stand for that).
Am I proposing huge income taxes?
Actually, no, if you would consider how much business expense and personal expense would be spared instead, while huge financial risks are eliminated.
For example, the government gives me now something like $3,000 child credit for my son, but, in reality, he costs me no less than $12,000/ yr (that is without any college tuition savings, since I cannot afford them right now). Most of this money goes to babysitters and extra-curriculum classes.
If there was an universal after-school program in my state, it would cost the government less than $3,000 per child. The state would simply keep existing school buildings open till 7PM, and schools would hire a few extra-curriculum instructors (music, tennis, chess, etc.) – that would cost the schools significantly less, if payroll tax, work-comp, etc. become employees’ responsibility.
So I am not going to get my $3000 child credit. But I would save $7000 instead and use this $ to support the economy via my discretionary spending. I would not have to save this money for my retirement, because I would contribute to my pension via income tax fund. I would also save at least $4,000/ yr on my medical insurance. Overall, I would have a little more or the same discretionary income, but I would feel so much safer regarding my retirement, my child education, medical emergencies, etc.. On top of it, I would know exactly where my taxpayer money goes, and my say on account of government spending would have more effect.
Actually, in real numbers my fantasy proposal would look like this:
Let’s take a guy in minimum tax bracket who makes $36,000/ yr. He actually nets only $24,000. On top of it, he contributes to his medical insurance $220/mo.
His small business employer shells out $65,000 for the honor of keeping this guy as an employee:
He pays him $36,000, pays $18,000 in payroll tax, and the rest in work-comp, liability and medical insurances.
If my proposal ever saw the light, the employer would pay my guy $48,000 and shell out $2,000 on top in liability insurance. The worker would $24,000 in taxes, but would net the same amount. He would save additional $2,500 on medical insurance. So he would be $2,500 richer. The employer saves $15,000. So it is $17,500 going into supporting economy via spending.
Besides enriching economy by $17,500, both guys feel more secure regarding their future (medical problems, retirement, disability, unemployment, etc).
This taxation method would also have effect on ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION issue. Because then we would not care how people got into the country, as long as they pay income taxes and do not strain our economy.
I would also eliminate welfare altogether, and substitute it with unemployment and disability benefits instead. All those who have never been able to work can be subsidized in the same way they are now through the income tax disability fund I have suggested.
Other well-talked about issues are ENVIRONMENT and OUR DEPENDENCY ON FOREIGN OIL. They actually go hand-in-hand. I actually see the solution to both as a rather easy one:
I would have the government tax businesses that produce, import, or use the oil itself or any devices that must use oil, and use this tax money to give tax credit to all businesses that produce and develop clean technology, and devices able to use the clean technology. Money is always the greatest motivator. So, for instance, gas stations that sell only gasoline are taxed, and those who sell natural gas are given credit. You would see many gas stations then switching to natural gas, with car engines switching immediately following. That is what they do on most of the Caribbean Islands already: they import a car and fix the engine right away so it can operate on natural gas. But then they can fill up the tank with natural gas on any gas station there. We cannot. That’s why we still use gasoline.
But I am happy that oil is so expensive now: so the incentive to develop and use the alternative is so much greater.
The same applies to heating oil. Russia is much richer than the U.S. in oil, and much colder. But it uses steam to heat the houses.
If we could produce cheaper and cleaner electricity via nuclear technology, why should not our tax dollars pay for it? We would get our money back by paying less for utilities each month.
Yes, an accident at a nuclear facility is scary. But, honestly, it is such a remote possibility. And that guy from Texas – what’s his name?- who wants to build wind turbines also makes much sense to me.
Give him the tax credit! And tax the oil companies instead with the special oil + dirty energy tax!
I would also eliminate the present farm subsidies and subsidize the organic farms instead.
As to spur our economy on right now, please, start re-pairing roads, levies, and other infrastructure A.S.A.P.. Not only bridges fall down and whole cities get flooded because we have been ignoring our infrastructure for too long, think how many so needed jobs would be created if we get on with it now.
Jobs mean money to spend, that feeds businesses, which create more jobs in turn. Healthy economy means more taxes collected, less foreign debt, etc.
Most importantly, re-building infrastructure means jobs here in America and not in India or China.
Unfortunately, we will continue to invest into those nations’ employment (read: economy) instead of ours if businesses here would continue to pay 50%+ extra for each employee than the employee’s actual wages.
Well, too bad I am not running for office 
)
But if I make any sense to you, please pass my musings along.
Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: after-school program, college, disability, economy, economy solutions, employment, environment, extra-curriculum activities, financial crisis, foreign oil dependancy, health care, immigration reform, jobs, McCain, Obama, pension, politics, real estate, taxes, tuition, universal health care | 6 Comments »
